The laptop gods looked down and saw that there was MUCH REJOICING at the new book deal and thought yea, verily, we'll smite the bastard in case he thinks he can get uppity now; and they did SMITE his front door yale lock so that upon his waking he found his LODGER engaged in a mighty struggle to escape the confines of a ground floor tenement flat in the south side of Glasgow, for the aforementioned lock was MIGHTILY BUGGERED and did refuse to BUDGE or OPEN.
Whereupon the author of this blog did call upon the EMERGENCY LOCKSMITH who put much sore violence from outside the house upon the errant front door lock with a chisel and drill, and replaced said lock at the same time with a new one. And the laptop gods LAUGHED as they saw the author hand over a princely sum of MANY TENNERS for this act of lock replacement, thereby allowing the author to ESCAPE and finally make his way to the day job, just a little bit more bleeding poorer.
1 comment:
That's one seriously pissed-off deity you have there. Typically, though, clearly lacking in imagination. I mean, fucking up the lock on the door when you were inside?
Deities are clearly not what they once were...
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